We equate control with results.
A natural product of this belief is that to achieve our desired objective, we need to have a strong contributory impact on the process. It’s a reasonable and rational belief. Leveling the weight of input with the hope of the output is certainly a motivator in and of itself; a strong motivator at that. But, it’s often not the most influential, or apparent, part of the equation.
Although our relative success requires both a concerted focus and effort toward the end result or product, we often get more tangled up in the control part of it all. Or, more aptly put, the potential loss of it. It’s normal to think that to get what we want we have to keep a firm grasp on how we get it. Control is power. Power gets you what you want. Or so is the axiom. But, when the process starts to possess an appearance that wasn’t part of our own blueprint, something that’s not out of the ordinary, we don’t readily adapt our plan. We grasp tighter. When things seem to go astray or even just take on an unexpected appearance, whether it appears good or bad, we infer a sense of loss of control. What happens in response, is a tightening of our grip.
And now, you’re forcing it. And now, you’re getting in the way.
Let’s say you wanted to hire someone to do a home renovation. You could probably muck your way through it, but you want it done right. So, you figure out what you want, how you want it to look, you find the right person to do the work and you’ve got checkbook in hand. It seems like you’ve done what you needed to do. How would the process go if, once this person showed up to the work, you hovered around all the time? Or, you constantly asked what they were doing? Or, how much longer it was going to take? Let’s even say you started handing this person tools they didn’t need or didn’t ask for. You’d really be getting in the way, wouldn’t you? Your project probably wouldn’t keep to its intended schedule. And, if you got in the way enough, it may possibly not even get done at all. Yet, the whole thing was your idea and now, you might the reason for its shortfall of success.
We like as much control as we can possibly convince ourselves is available to us. We don’t often assess how much of actual contribution we need to put towards a desired result, really, of any variety. More, it seems, is more. There is a measure whereby you do what’s needed of you and you step back and let the flow of the energy you’ve created take it the rest of the way. Once you open the dam, you can’t use your hands to push the water through faster; it will go as it will go. It’s by speaking to the Universe, to your God, to the stars in the sky, and saying, “I want this, I’m going to do my part, please do yours” that sustains the most force. But, doesn’t force it. WITH, the understanding that what you might get may not be exactly what you thought you were aiming for, but will certainly be what you need at that juncture in your life.
There is freedom and strength in faith and letting go. There is solace and comfort in subscribing to a grander idea than just you in your own corner trying to make things happen. Do your part, delegate the rest, get a good’s night sleep.
Be Love.
