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the relevance of intimacy

“the most intimate thing we can do is to allow people we love most to see us at our worst. At our lowest. At our weakest. True intimacy happens when nothing is perfect”. Amy Harmon

Intimacy, for many, conjures up thoughts of the physicality between two people. The admittance we grant to another person to be close to us in sensory perception form. To share a “human being” experience.

For some, a more personal intimacy represents the plane in a relationship whereby the closeness of the individualities of each person has created, in a manner of speaking, a conjunctive reflection of both into one; a fostering of openness and connection.

And, for fewer still, a greater depth of intimacy will be ultimately realized in its entirety upon that moment that they fully reveal themselves, as aptly quoted, “….to allow people we love most to see us at our worst”; to share a “being human” experience – the most vulnerable act of openness and connection.

Of the three, this is always the last one to show itself. If it shows itself at all.

It makes sense that it’s the last one. It’s the toughest. It’s the most personal. It’s usually the final piece of our own intimacy puzzle.

When we share a physical experience with someone, it’s a two-person endeavor. There is, of course, intimacy involved, but it’s of a different nature. As counterintuitive as it may seem, this intimacy is not as personal as one may think. Why? Because it’s mutually shared. It’s happening at the same time and both are doing the same thing. No one person is really in the spotlight. And, although I do strongly believe there is a great intimacy and connection shared within the physical nature of a relationship, it seems that more and more have very limited regard for what means to share that with another person. It’s, sorta, just the way things are. Sleep with you now, get to know you know you later. Maybe.

Another level of intimacy reached within a relationship is that of familiarity and of fluency. It taps into that space beyond the physical (if there is a physical relationship; most relationships are not physical) and an introductory level of mental and emotional common ground. There is more here. There is an intertwining of each person from a more pervasive perspective. It’s a reciprocal embrace of another individual; acceptance of who they are on a deeper level. A product of time, respect, desire to connect, foster growth and to, simply, cultivate a relationship. Maybe even Love. It’s when each person has made the choice to place a personal investment in the other, together. It is the basis of meaningful relationship, or if romantically involved, to find that ‘someone’.

There is still a heightened intimacy beyond this. Past shared physical experience, past mental investment, past the building of a relationship. It comes subsequent to the sharing of those intimacies. This intimacy comes as a product of vulnerability, safety, trust and a Love at a deeper level; different from the others. When physical intimacy is shared, it is shared together. When relationship intimacy is shared, it is shared together. When the intimacy of vulnerability and trust, in the form of personal internal emotion is shared, it is often done so by one and received by the other; a given gift. It’s when we let the other see us fully and completely.

This gift is when we are at our most intimate. We are actively giving ourselves from within, to be received but not reciprocated. We attempt to allow another person to experience a fragment of what we are experiencing ourselves with the trust and confidence that there is compassion waiting for us on the other side. That there is understanding and empathy. That, not only will we be Loved, but Loved more.

This intimacy is courageous. It is not the happy-go-lucky parts of a relationship. It is a person saying, “this is all of me. This is everything about me that you cannot see. I trust you”. When this intimacy touches a person, it is one of the most realest experiences of true connection. It is a person wanting to release everything about them; everything that they carry inside. I do mean that this offering is truly a gift. Think of what you hold most closely inside whether it be Love or the toughest personal challenge. Each of which we only share when our Heart has made the choice.

Give your Heart to this intimacy both as the one offering it and as the one receiving it. Understand it for what it is. Be grateful for what it is. And, Love more because of it.

Be Love.


It can often be difficult to ask for. Or accept. For some, even a last resort. The thought of vulnerability can be incredibly daunting. It exposes us. It puts our imperfection on display.

Surrendering ourselves to seeking help can illicit any number of emotions and ideas within us; failure, defeat, diminished self-worth, weakness and, of course, helplessness. Feelings of burden consume us or even a manufactured obligation to always be at one’s best when we believe others are depending upon us.

Asking for help means we “couldn’t do it” and for some, there is a belief that they should always be able to do it.

If I have learned anything, if I have experienced anything in my life, it’s that I cannot do everything on my own. We were not meant to do everything on our own. We Love so that we can help. We help so that we can Love. And, our beauty is because we are not perfect.

I have sought help in my ‘obligation’ to offer what words I might have to give. I’ve opened with my own, but close with another’s who can say better what I could not. And, for that, I am grateful that there is help. Because help is help. Like Love, there is no pride in help. Whether it’s my own message or one that I pass along, it’s about what it moves inside of you. Not how it gets there.

Be Love.

“I find beauty in things others never see. I find hope there, too. Life is what you make of it. Life is taking not so beautiful things and making them beautiful. It is finding hope even when there is none. This is not an easy thing to do but I find that Love is the answer to most things, if not all things. Why not Love more? If you do not give your Love away, then it means nothing. In essence, it is a wasted love. No one will ever feel it. Love is meant to be felt. To be given away freely, regardless of what you get back in return. We all want our lives to have meaning. So we can say we were here and we Loved with everything we had. My life is not perfect but it’s mine and I never wanted perfect. I want real. I want to feel. And, I have Loved, really Loved. A lot. And, above all I have lived, really lived. And, I still Love”.

 -NR Hart





hey, thanks for giving

Gratitude. The new black of the enlighten path. Journals, meditation apps, Instagram quotes. It’s everywhere. And, rightfully so. Gratitude can be very powerful if intentionally practised, as goes the karma with simple appreciation for what you have; for your life.

The practice of gratitude is exercising vibrational shift. It’s not super science to understand that being thankful is putting yourself in a better frame of mind than if you were to be focusing on that which you don’t have. Practising gratitude elicits a feeling of abundance. That feeling of abundance raises your vibration which, in turn, puts you in a better place mentally, emotionally and spiritually. It doesn’t have to be an elaborate endeavour. Even simply think of your basic functioning health relative to what many others have to contend with. That alone is enough to appreciate how precious life is.

For most of us (I’m assuming), we have more than we don’t have. Not uncommon, it’s easy to focus on what we lack; even when what we do have vastly outweighs what we don’t. Let’s chalk it up to the human condition. Does that make it excusatory? No. But, you don’t have to beat yourself up about it, either. Awareness, right?

Gratitude elevates your vibration; it shifts your focus. If you’re a subscriber to the law of attraction, when you give thanks for what you have, you put yourself in a position to be able to give more thanks for more things. Once you get that snowball rolling down the hill, you will move with the power. It will require less of a push and more ‘keeping up’ with the abundance.

But! As much as all of that is indeed ‘practising’ gratitude, I’d like to challenge the notion (in a good way).

Establishing an internal emotional foundation of gratitude is definitely the starting point. That’s where the journals, the meditation apps, the Instagram quotes and introspective thought all come into play; they assist in the focus. That is ‘contemplating’ gratitude. It’s an awareness to it. It’s acknowledging and receiving the energy of it. It’s building that framework so as to be able to expand upon it in a greater capacity.

But, ‘practising’ gratitude?

Practising gratitude is that next step from contemplating gratitude. It’s doing something with the contemplation. We’ve all read or heard stories of those with even the most meager of resources still finding a way to give to the less fortunate. A simplistic illustration of the bounds that are possible.

But, practising gratitude isn’t really all that metric. It can be, but it’s just giving something tangible. Practising gratitude is really just being the best person you possibly can. When you’ve acknowledged all that you have to be thankful for, how do you translate that into your everyday actions? How do you use the energy of that higher vibration? Are you kind? Do you offer a smile or hug whenever you can? Do you respect the earth? Do you lift others up? Do you accept the gratitude and Love of others? Or, do you complain? Do you make yourself a victim? Do you view things through a negative lens? Do you focus on what you need to simply further your own agenda? Do you turn away the gratitude and Love of others? How are you really practising gratitude?

It’s possible to contemplate gratitude at great length, on a daily basis, but not actually live it. Not actually practise it. And hey, I get it. It’s not so easy to wake up one day and start doing all these positive things without any hiccups. But then, how else do you do it? How else do you start doing something other than start doing it? Your mind, your emotions, your awareness, all have to begin somewhere. It’s a conscious choice to hold yourself accountable to share how beautiful you are. And, it starts with the recognition and appreciation of the beauty in your life. It’s the input of that energy that fuels the output of our actions.

Practising gratitude is how you live out what you have to be grateful for in your life. Being in the space of gratitude is what enables us to share the space of gratitude. And, sharing the space of gratitude, whether reciprocated or not, builds that energy and vibration. It builds your spirit, it builds your Love.

“for it is in giving that we receive.”

                                    Francis of Assisi

Be Love.










how to fight for what you believe in


It’s on its way, if it’s not already here – the things that matter to you in life. The things that matter the most in life. These are the things that you’ve realized are integral in forming what you want your life to look like. These are the things that are the real embodiment of what is in your Heart. You will feel that you’ll be better at it than anyone else has ever been, even if there have many before you. You will feel that it’s meant to be; that it is your path. And, the path, will be clear to your sight, to your vision, to your being.

1.Figure it out

What is it, exactly, that you’re fighting for? What we believe we’re striving for is not always actually what it truly is. Think about if what you’re after is something just on the surface or a deeper fulfillment. You will need a level of self awareness and reflection here. You will need to speak to your Heart. The amount of fight you have will be only be strengthened by how clear and how true  it is in your Heart. This is the big stuff in life.

2.Don’t set parameters

Contrary to what most “success” step plans advise, don’t define exactly what you’re going to do. I’ll tell you this, if you are truly fighting for something that is imprinted within your Heart, the idea of what you’ll do and not do will be as unpredictable as unpredictable gets. Resign to the fact that you won’t know everything that’s coming and how you’ll respond.

3.Stay grounded

Now that you’ve thrown out the idea of having a definitive set plan as to what you’ll do or not do to realize your goal, you still need to maintain a sense of ground. When it comes time to make a decision, act on something, find words to say, or a sacrifice to make (and the time will come, more than once), your Heart will tell you if what you’re about to do enriches it or compromises it. If it translates into building your strength, offering some learning, showing compassion, exercising forgiveness, enabling understanding, lifting someone up (including yourself), that’s a green light. If it questions your self respect, diminishes your self Love, bolsters your pride or boosts your ego, hurts someone (including yourself), that’s a red light.

4.Be emotional

True growth isn’t a stoic endeavour. If what you’re doing means the universe to you, then you’re going to feel it. That kinda makes sense, no? “Toughing it out” and “powering through” won’t teach you everything you need to learn. Sure, there’s a time and a place for pulling up your socks to keep moving forward, but there’s also a time and a place to sit yourself down. To cry. To be lost. To feel like you can’t do it. To be angry. To question what you’re doing. You need all of that. You need to get it in you as much as you need to get it out of you. Being emotional can offer clarity and just a general clear out. Like, lovingly taking out the trash. Some stuff will probably get recycled, too.

5.The cheese stands alone

You’re not cheese.

No one will fight as hard as you for what it is that you believe in or want. It’s just simple math. But, that doesn’t mean there aren’t people that won’t fight for YOU. The right people will support you the right way. Whether it’s a close person that knows what’s in your Heart or someone that has the knowledge and experience you don’t, ask for help. Lean on others for support, for guidance, for gut checks. We aren’t here to do everything alone.

6.Gut checks

It’s incredibly imperative to seek help and advice; to get another perspective, a different idea, encouragement, a lift in strength, to learn. But, ultimately, whatever knowledge you’ve garnered from whatever source it is, your intuition is your best guide. Absorb experience and information, your own and from the outside, and process it internally. Your Heart and your intuition will know where to steer you.

7.Watch out for fear

Fear lurks everywhere. It will infiltrate your mind, it will disguise itself as your intuition and it will try to silence your Heart. Why? Because you’re human. Because you’re putting the most important thing about you out there to be vulnerable. Because you’ve lived through past experiences that your brain wants to protect you from repeating. But, it’s not real. The reason you’re doing this, the real reason that’s because of what’s in your Heart, that’s the reason to follow. Fear is a liar.

8.Believe in magic

It’s free and without it, 9. doesn’t work.


The power of the Heart is an immeasurable force that cannot be rivaled. It will provide you patience, strength, resolve, dedication and perseverance that you would have never envisioned having. But, you need the Universe. You need to close your eyes, look squarely at it and say, “it needs to be you and I for this to work.” The Universe is there for you. The Universe will get in your corner, with your Heart, and take on the parts that you just can’t. It’s bigger than you and that’s why you need the Universe. It seems counter-intuitive (and scary) to leave something so big up to something that we can’t see or touch, but that’s where the power is. To have faith. You do 1. to 8. and then let go. Subscribe to faith. Get out of the way and let the Universe do its magic. And, it will do its magic. The second you believe in it is the second it becomes possible.


It wouldn’t be a list without it. Love. Love without expectation. Love without reciprocation. Love without anticipation. Love with perfect chaos. Just Love. Love those who Love you. Love those that don’t. Love the journey. Love the path. Love yourself.

Never lose sight of what’s in your Heart. Never lose sight of Love.

Be Love


is this thing on?

There’s a reason we don’t instinctually speak with our Heart. Many reasons in fact; fear, the possibility of rejection, uncertainty, embarrassment, inexperience, past experience; to give a short list of a much longer list.

As we absorb our own life experience and observe other life experiences around us, we accumulate the residue of negative inference. In the same context, we do so of positive derivatives. That is a bit of the science behind the soul. We try things out, we create an action, we receive the result and we measure the conclusion. As a product, it shapes our comfort towards who we’re willing to be.

The instinct of the mind is to inherently attempt a translation of cause and effect. It searches for correlation. It’s how it learns and evolves. And, it does so for your protection. Much like how, if no one told you of the danger of touching a hot stove, your mind would be sure you would learn the lesson very quickly and resolutely the first time you did tough the stove. It would be the only time you did.
With similarity, the mind will do the same of emotions and feelings. It will create its version of cause and effect and provide a pathway for your mind to learn to do something, as a response. Or, to not do something. In all cases, it does so to avoid a negative consequence or to produce a positive benefit. It is how the mind attempts to protect you.

But, the oversight of the mind is that there is no protection required from the Heart. There is no cause and effect of the Heart. “Always do the right thing”; you know what that means to me now? It means, always do what’s in your Heart. Be the truth that’s in your Heart. It means being your real self without the conditioned fear of what the effect is to your cause. The cause is to open to your Heart. It’s to be in the vibration of your Heart. It’s to be in the truth of your Heart. The effect is the peace you experience. It’s the freedom of your soul. It’s the expansion of your universe. The cause and effect of an act of the Heart is entirely internal. You do not control that which is outside of you. To believe that idea is not what is in alignment with your Heart. Can you inspire? Yes. Can you help others unlock their Heart? Yes. Can you attract the Heart which you have inside of you, to you? Yes. But, that’s as far as it goes and that’s as far as it needs to go.

There is no shortage of hurt in this world. There is no shortage of insult, of rejection, of misinterpretation and misunderstanding. But, it’s not as result of what is from the Heart. It’s not because of doing the right thing; the Heart thing. It’s because of all that is not where the Heart is. It doesn’t need to be understood any further or any greater than. What we need to teach ourselves is that when we speak, act, live from the Heart, we’ve done the right thing. No matter what the response, what the reaction or what the result. To be discouraged because of a less-than-positive response, reaction or result is tying together a cause and effect that is not meant to be tied together. It’s matching to frequencies that don’t belong together.

When you live your Heart, you inspire your universe to show up for you. You open the pathway that says this is what you want in your life. It sends out the highest frequency and level of attraction for all things in life by saying “I’m not scared of being Love or being Loved”. Not to mention, it’s just the right thing to do.

Be Love.

….who’s there?

I’m not there. Yet. Arguably will never be. In fact, to not be a contradiction, I would have to conclude that I’ll never be there. But, that’s not the point. The point is that you try.

Ever really think about who you are? Ever really think about the things you’ve learned about yourself? Or, the things you still don’t know about yourself? I’m not speaking about what your favourite colour is, or the name of the dog you owned when you were eight, or how many Fakebook friends you have.
I’m talking about who you really are. In the place that no one can know except for you. It’s not the easiest thing to answer. It’s not the easiest thing to understand. The potential of your consciousness, your awareness, your compassion, your Love, ends somewhere around limitless. And so, maybe there is no static answer? That’s evolution, I would believe – no static answer, no static conclusion. It will go as far as you can take it. Maybe it’s not about how you’ll get to the end that doesn’t actually exist, but that you just try. You strive.

I don’t think the question gets asked a lot. I don’t think we consciously ask ourselves, “who am I?” And, if you did, then what happens? It’s, quite possibly, the most real question you could ask of yourself. It’s a whirlwind in there. Everything about you is in the there. All your beauty; all your ugliness. The joy you’ve experienced; the abuse you’ve harboured. How you’ve treated people; how you’ve been treated. Real is not easy. Real is real. It can be a kick when you’re already down.

Observe. Observe what you see and hear around you. Observe what you see and hear of yourself. How much of it is Love? How much of it isn’t? There’s a lot of selfishness out there, arrogance, intimidation, deceit, abuse; it’s difficult to process the magnitude of it all. I understand it’s not an optimistic assessment, but it’s accurate. It’s all out there because we are not inside ourselves. We are not inside of who we really are.

I will forever believe in the goodness of people. I believe it’s in everyone. I, also, believe there’s a lot of accountability and responsibility that’s been neglected. We don’t want to face our demons, we don’t want to resolve our guilt, we don’t want to acknowledge our indiscretions. We don’t want to do the work that comes with the question, “who am I?” And so, we don’t. We put what we can’t manage onto others, onto the universe and onto ourselves. The result is that we don’t live in Love.

When I ask myself the question of who I believe I am, I’m overwhelmed. I feel all the shitty things I’ve done and that have been done to me. I feel my insecurities and my inadequacies. I feel confusion and doubt. But, I feel something more than all of those combined. I feel a belief and a strength in Love. I feel compassion. I feel the pull to face the hard stuff and resolve within myself that I don’t want to be a part of it. I don’t want to be a person that is anything less than what the Heart is supposed to be. I don’t feel a desire to move toward the hurt, I feel a pull to move toward the light. It’s making the conscious choice to move to the light; to be a good person. It’s acknowledging that you have that choice to make.

It’s the biggest question to ask yourself, “who am I?” To find the soul, the being, the Heart that is underneath what everyone else sees and even what we mask to ourselves. All of it is real and none of it should be ignored. Teach yourself, remind yourself, affirm yourself that Love is bigger than all of it. When you face it all simultaneously, you will experience how everything stacks up. Love is a skyscraper surrounded by convenience stores. Nothing truly compares to it. And, if you don’t completely feel sure, it’s because you haven’t completely asked yourself the question, “who am I?” You are not anything but Love; to give and to receive and to accept. You are not anything but Love, to embody and to experience and to educate. You are not anything but Love.

Be Love.


may the force not be with you….just roll with it

We equate control with results.

A natural product of this belief is that to achieve our desired objective, we need to have a strong contributory impact on the process. It’s a reasonable and rational belief. Leveling the weight of input with the hope of the output is certainly a motivator in and of itself; a strong motivator at that. But, it’s often not the most influential, or apparent, part of the equation.

Although our relative success requires both a concerted focus and effort toward the end result or product, we often get more tangled up in the control part of it all. Or, more aptly put, the potential loss of it. It’s normal to think that to get what we want we have to keep a firm grasp on how we get it. Control is power. Power gets you what you want. Or so is the axiom. But, when the process starts to possess an appearance that wasn’t part of our own blueprint, something that’s not out of the ordinary, we don’t readily adapt our plan. We grasp tighter. When things seem to go astray or even just take on an unexpected appearance, whether it appears good or bad, we infer a sense of loss of control. What happens in response, is a tightening of our grip.

And now, you’re forcing it. And now, you’re getting in the way.

Let’s say you wanted to hire someone to do a home renovation. You could probably muck your way through it, but you want it done right. So, you figure out what you want, how you want it to look, you find the right person to do the work and you’ve got checkbook in hand. It seems like you’ve done what you needed to do. How would the process go if, once this person showed up to the work, you hovered around all the time? Or, you constantly asked what they were doing? Or, how much longer it was going to take? Let’s even say you started handing this person tools they didn’t need or didn’t ask for. You’d really be getting in the way, wouldn’t you? Your project probably wouldn’t keep to its intended schedule. And, if you got in the way enough, it may possibly not even get done at all. Yet, the whole thing was your idea and now, you might the reason for its shortfall of success.

We like as much control as we can possibly convince ourselves is available to us. We don’t often assess how much of actual contribution we need to put towards a desired result, really, of any variety. More, it seems, is more. There is a measure whereby you do what’s needed of you and you step back and let the flow of the energy you’ve created take it the rest of the way. Once you open the dam, you can’t use your hands to push the water through faster; it will go as it will go. It’s by speaking to the Universe, to your God, to the stars in the sky, and saying, “I want this, I’m going to do my part, please do yours” that sustains the most force. But, doesn’t force it. WITH, the understanding that what you might get may not be exactly what you thought you were aiming for, but will certainly be what you need at that juncture in your life.

There is freedom and strength in faith and letting go. There is solace and comfort in subscribing to a grander idea than just you in your own corner trying to make things happen. Do your part, delegate the rest, get a good’s night sleep.

Be Love.

it’s not what you know, it’s what you now

“Be in the now”, “live in the now”, “be present’; modern day consumable mantra for the masses. Governance of the soul that is literally eons old. The Buddha spoke of it, Alan Watts narrated it, Eckhart Tolle authors upon it.

There is a chance that, as you read this, you are in the now. You are simply here, reading. For these four minutes, there is no yesterday, no tomorrow, no to-do list. Just here. Just now. Why? Because it’s simple. Your presence of now requires something very simple; your attention and a brief amount of time. Reading this, or not reading this for that matter, doesn’t come with any apparent “consequence”. It doesn’t impact your health, your loved ones, your future or your bank account. It will disappear as easily as it appeared and, for all intents and purposes, you could be no better or no worse for it. So, for these few moments, it’s easy to be in the now; fully present, embracing what is, whether consciously or not.

As I write this, I am too here. In the now. There is nothing else taking up my space but this. I know, however, that maybe not immediately, but sooner than later, life will catch up to my current presence of now. It’s how I think of it; that being in the now is being ahead of “life”. “Life”, with quotations. Very soon, I will be back in a pattern of thinking about “life”; the decisions I’ve made, the decisions I will have to make and the decisions I don’t even yet know about.

I’m learning, though. I’m learning about what “now” means to me. It doesn’t mean to ignore the past and not learn from it, but it means to leave it there. It doesn’t mean to disregard the future and live as though each day was your last, but it means to appreciate and respect the finality of it. I want to be in the “now” because I know it will most constructively use what the past has taught me and most beautifully create the future that is waiting for me.

I know that it’s a redundant theme around here but, for me, it’s everything to do with what’s in my Heart. Being in the “now” means living what’s in my Heart and not caring what I think. Yes, you read that right. Not caring what I think. It’s one thing to be concerned with what others think; it’s a true presence of spiritual being to not be concerned with what you, yourself, think. It means that you’ve discovered what is most important to your Heart and you do the best you can to live that every day. It means that you don’t care how many times you screw up or feel you could have done better. It means that you don’t care about emotions like pride and justice and being right; emotions that don’t serve your authentic self. It means that you’re finding peace within.

I’ve experienced that living the truth that is in your Heart is where peace is found. And, peace is being in the now. When we feel peace, we have a lot easier of a time with being present. You will feel it when you know you’re there. You will feel like both you and a greater power are both in control and in charge. It’s what will allow you to be present in whatever it is that is happening. You can experience peace in any emotion. You are allowed to still be scared or nervous or excited or joyful or anything; it’s just, are you living what’s true? True to what’s in your Heart?

Be Love.

to be yourself, or not to be yourself?….

To be yourself, or not to be yourself?….

Somewhere, probably a long while ago, something didn’t go the way you’d hoped it would; or, the way you thought it would. Likely, more than once. A bunch of times, I would imagine. Back when you were differently resilient. Back when you didn’t even know what it meant to be resilient. You just knew what it was to be you. It was a time where, perhaps, you weren’t more resilient or less resilient, but differently resilient. Not as much mattered back then. A lot of life hadn’t happened to you, yet.

Back then, you were more of yourself. You liked what you liked and you thought what you thought; you said what you said and you felt what you felt. None of it was ever to harm or hurt anyone. It was just what was you. But, somewhere along the way, someone didn’t agree with who you were. It may have been something largely insignificant like making fun of your favourite shirt or not letting you into a secret recess club, or something that you felt very deeply about like stepping on your dream to be a race car driver or even abandonment. At the time, all of those things were life. There was really nothing more because there couldn’t be any more. In turn, you only knew how to be you; the real you. But, along that path, there came the time where being the real you seemed to not be accepted. It seemed, “not good enough”. Thus, introduced was the idea that the real you was something that had the potential to not be accepted. It introduced the idea of being something other than the real you for reason of acceptance.

And now, fast forward. You have a job, responsibilities, obligations. You have aspirations and goals. You have expectations and dreams. You have “friends” and you have friends. You have a login and a password (or eighteen). You have insecurities and cognitive dissonance. You have hurt and you have emotional trauma. Back then, you didn’t really have many or even any of those things; you had a scraped knee. Everything you brought to the outside, came truly from the inside. And now, a lot of what’s on the inside has come from the outside.

If you knew then what you know now, you wouldn’t have cared about anything other than the real you. You would have known that the Universe, Love, God, Source, supports the true, inner you; the you that comes from within your Heart. It wouldn’t have mattered what anyone thought or said or did because you would have known they weren’t with the program, and that’s ok for them. They’ll get there at some point. And so, because you’re a human, when “you” weren’t accepted, it conditioned you to believe there was some other version of you that you needed to find; that you needed to become. Years and decades of that search has resulted in being more lost. And, no wonder we’re scared to be who we really are. We hardly recognize who that person is. Our lives are filled with much of what we’ve convinced ourselves to “matter” but that of which really very little forwards and fosters the Love inside of our Heart. We bought into the falsity of the reward system of falling in line with the outside when we should have been buying into the reward system of falling in Love with the inside.

The Universe doesn’t shake your hand and give you a hundred dollar bill for being who you are. It asks you to have faith and stick up for Love. And, when you stick up for Love, you stick up for the real you. It doesn’t look the same for everyone because we’re not the same. But, it feels the same. Love does not see, it feels. It doesn’t look for pros and cons, or reason and rhyme, it just points to your Heart and asks, “what makes that bigger?” It’s a rhetorical question.

Be Love.

better late than whatever

Technically, I’m late.

Some time ago, I’d made a commitment to myself that I would write every Sunday; it was my pledge. To do so, meant something for me. For what I believed in. And, somewhere inside of me, there was a part that hoped it meant something to someone, anyone, other than me. I kept to that self-imposed deadline no matter how seemingly stuck my thoughts were that day, how tired I was or even if I had to push it into the early morning hours of Monday. Having something there meant something to me.

But this time, I’m really late.

I felt some guilt about it. I felt like I, kind of, let myself down. I felt like maybe there was a chance I’d disappointed someone else. And, to be honest, I felt like just forgetting about it all together. I mean, there would be next week.

I felt the power of how easy it could be to give up. Even if just momentarily.

I don’t think I’d ever known myself to be a person to give up. Well, at least not for what is important to me; and, this is important to me. The truth is, though, I briefly questioned that idea. I wondered if it really was important to me. I wondered if it mattered one way or another. I wondered if I believed in what I believe in. When I phrased to myself in those ways, it didn’t feel like I was ok with any of those notions. It didn’t feel like just fast forwarding through to the following Sunday was really what would be in alignment with my original intention. I mean, it’s not really a big deal, but forgetting about it just felt like I was ignoring it. And, I don’t think there is a lot of resolution to be found in disregard.

The question, “does it really matter?”echoed itself. Quickly followed by the real question I was more embarrassed acknowledge, “does it really matter to anyone?” I remembered, though, that wasn’t the question I’d asked myself when I started doing this. So, why am I asking it now?

When I felt that bit of shame attached to questioning my intention and motivation behind sharing my words, I also did my best to find compassion in that. To embrace that I’m human, that I’m fallible and that sometimes the things that light up my Heart might become temporarily dim from time to time.

I’d decided that I would answer the questions this way; it is important to me, it does matter and I do believe in what I believe. Those were the answers in my Heart, from my Heart. I knew where I needed to be. For me and not anything else. Late or not, I would have something.

As if right on cue, I received a text asking if I was ok and if everything was ok because there was no new post this past Sunday. I chuckled and shook my head at myself; the universe waited just long enough for me to decide, on the inside, that I did matter before giving me a message, from the outside, that it was true.

First believe. Then see.

Be Love.