When’s the last time you tried on a new pair of shoes?
Kinda deceiving, a new pair of shoes, can be. Usually, you’re a size 8. But this time, this pair fits a bit small. Those ones over there really catch your eye; too bad they feel like you just stepped into a bear trap. Hold on though, the pair on the top shelf. Those are perfect. Shit, maybe if you didn’t have a mortgage and a car payment and groceries to buy.
And so, we spend this time, going store to store, undertaking the due diligence we’re all entitled to when exercising our consumerist rights. Maybe we end up buying ourselves a new pair of slides or, maybe our adventure goes on armed with a bit more information and knowledge about what we’re looking for?
When it comes to figuring out what feels the best on us and for us, we often take that time that is necessary. But, when it comes to the person in front of us in line or next to us on the bus or that we work with, we’re pretty convinced we know exactly what they’re wearing.
I wonder how their shoes feel?
Compassion fits everyone.
We all have a closet full of shoes. Some of ‘em look really nice and make us feel great; some of ‘em fit like junk and really bring us down. We’re always getting rid of pairs we don’t need and picking up new ones as we go. But, do we ever take the time to put on someone else’s shoes? Maybe we’re too busy admiring our own, or trying to shine up the scuffs? Maybe our laces came undone and we have to stop and tie them up? Or, maybe we just can’t understand why someone would put on the pair they have and we, plain and simple, just don’t give a darn.
Why is that?
When you take a moment to stop walking in your own shoes and try to step into someone else’s, you open up your willingness for compassion. You open up your Heart.
Compassion isn’t an exercise in empathy, sympathy or feeling sorry for someone. It’s trying to be that person. It’s trying to understand what it is they’re experiencing in their situation, their mind and in their Heart and asking yourself, “what if that were me”?
Pausing to step into someone’s shoes is your way to be their sadness, their frustration and their anger, but from a constructive place of Love. When you take that pause, your tendency to judge and to react will slow down and will evolve itself into a desire to understand and relate. Not only is it the way to their Heart, it’s the way to yours.
When you cross paths with that someone, be it a family member, friend, acquaintance or stranger, on that difficult road, walk in their shoes. Stop, take yours off, put theirs on and carry them.
be Love.
If we all wear other people’s shoes, the world will be different, and will be better. I used to believe that if I treat everyone well, I will get the same in return. The reality is not true. There are two kinds of people in my life, one is I treat them nice and they treat me back the same manner or better; and the other group basically think I should treat them well without a reason and if I don’t, that is not right. I used to think if I give some time, the second group of people will start to realize that friendship is two way and will treat me the same way back, but it didn’t work out in that way. Then I let them go away from my life and focus on those who really care for me and love me. The world is never fair and is not as beautiful as I used to think. By saying this, it doesn’t mean I am negative, but I have realized what is important in my life and what is not. Life is too short, I don’t like calculating any gain or loss in my life, all I want is to be happy and enjoy my life as much as I can. Take care, be bright and be love.
To put ourselves in one’s shoes is not only for them, but for us, also. It is for them by that we can begin to change our learned response whether that is annoyance, frustration, anger or sadness to support, tolerance, encouragement and compassion. We can steady ourselves and realize that their action is not personal to us, but rather, personal to them and a plea for help.
It is for us in that by realizing that the actions taken out on us, are not personal to us, but rather perception and opinion of someone else, we can lessen the affect it has on us. We can begin to remove the guilt we feel and allow ourselves to fall into alignment with where our Heart is trying to get us, Love for not only our fellow man but for ourselves.
be Love. 🙂
One more thing, I like to feel the feeling of those people who couldn’t talk. I like to know and taste the feeling of those who have a disability in their lives. I am already lucky enough of my life, and I don’t need to feel those whose life is better than mine. I want to feel the ones who have a painful feeling in their life. I can’t imagine what they have to been through in order to live in this world. I sometimes wonder what if I live in such a country that is so isolated and poor with no hope, will I still have a life and will I survive? Or what if I live in a country full with danger and the war is never stopping, how will I face and deal with them? Anyways, by saying these, my point and conclusion is I have no reason to complain on the stuff I used to think is a big deal and I need to live the best out of my life. Good night! Stay in love! Will you make a snow man with a heart as it is snowing outside?
I can understand why you would want to experience those challenges that others face. But instead, if I may, I would like to suggest a different challenge. Rather than experience the type of “disability” as you mentioned, experience your “ability”. Cherish that you can hear music and see art and sing along to the radio. Cherish that you can run up a flight of stairs or prepare your own meal or drive a car. When we quantify those who face these certain challenges as having a “painful feeling”, although not intentionally, we do them a disservice by not believing that who they are and the abilities they have to be a blessing specifically made for them.
I, myself, need to do a better job of raising my vibration to all the great things around me rather than lowering it to what seems to not be in alignment with me and what may potentially befall me. I once read, “worrying is like praying for something bad to happen”. We can all benefit from less worrying and more “being”.
be Love. 🙂
Thank you!! Yes “worrying is like praying for something bad to happen”. Thus, I am always mentally ready for anything that could happen and I keep on telling myself that there is nothing that I can’t lose and I will get them all back later. Because I don’t know what is going to happen next, I decide to live, love and laugh without any regret. I have never saving my smile and laugh; I will always make sure the ones that I love know and feel my love towards them; and my life has to live in the way that I want it to be (by saying this I didn’t mean I need my life to be perfect, just in a way that without any regret). Good night and sleep tight! Friendly reminder: if you have bananas at home, eat one as it may help you sleeping. Be love 🙂
Oh. Maybe I will make a snowman when there is some more snow. 🙂