Monthly archives "August 2018"

to be yourself, or not to be yourself?….

To be yourself, or not to be yourself?….

Somewhere, probably a long while ago, something didn’t go the way you’d hoped it would; or, the way you thought it would. Likely, more than once. A bunch of times, I would imagine. Back when you were differently resilient. Back when you didn’t even know what it meant to be resilient. You just knew what it was to be you. It was a time where, perhaps, you weren’t more resilient or less resilient, but differently resilient. Not as much mattered back then. A lot of life hadn’t happened to you, yet.

Back then, you were more of yourself. You liked what you liked and you thought what you thought; you said what you said and you felt what you felt. None of it was ever to harm or hurt anyone. It was just what was you. But, somewhere along the way, someone didn’t agree with who you were. It may have been something largely insignificant like making fun of your favourite shirt or not letting you into a secret recess club, or something that you felt very deeply about like stepping on your dream to be a race car driver or even abandonment. At the time, all of those things were life. There was really nothing more because there couldn’t be any more. In turn, you only knew how to be you; the real you. But, along that path, there came the time where being the real you seemed to not be accepted. It seemed, “not good enough”. Thus, introduced was the idea that the real you was something that had the potential to not be accepted. It introduced the idea of being something other than the real you for reason of acceptance.

And now, fast forward. You have a job, responsibilities, obligations. You have aspirations and goals. You have expectations and dreams. You have “friends” and you have friends. You have a login and a password (or eighteen). You have insecurities and cognitive dissonance. You have hurt and you have emotional trauma. Back then, you didn’t really have many or even any of those things; you had a scraped knee. Everything you brought to the outside, came truly from the inside. And now, a lot of what’s on the inside has come from the outside.

If you knew then what you know now, you wouldn’t have cared about anything other than the real you. You would have known that the Universe, Love, God, Source, supports the true, inner you; the you that comes from within your Heart. It wouldn’t have mattered what anyone thought or said or did because you would have known they weren’t with the program, and that’s ok for them. They’ll get there at some point. And so, because you’re a human, when “you” weren’t accepted, it conditioned you to believe there was some other version of you that you needed to find; that you needed to become. Years and decades of that search has resulted in being more lost. And, no wonder we’re scared to be who we really are. We hardly recognize who that person is. Our lives are filled with much of what we’ve convinced ourselves to “matter” but that of which really very little forwards and fosters the Love inside of our Heart. We bought into the falsity of the reward system of falling in line with the outside when we should have been buying into the reward system of falling in Love with the inside.

The Universe doesn’t shake your hand and give you a hundred dollar bill for being who you are. It asks you to have faith and stick up for Love. And, when you stick up for Love, you stick up for the real you. It doesn’t look the same for everyone because we’re not the same. But, it feels the same. Love does not see, it feels. It doesn’t look for pros and cons, or reason and rhyme, it just points to your Heart and asks, “what makes that bigger?” It’s a rhetorical question.

Be Love.

better late than whatever

Technically, I’m late.

Some time ago, I’d made a commitment to myself that I would write every Sunday; it was my pledge. To do so, meant something for me. For what I believed in. And, somewhere inside of me, there was a part that hoped it meant something to someone, anyone, other than me. I kept to that self-imposed deadline no matter how seemingly stuck my thoughts were that day, how tired I was or even if I had to push it into the early morning hours of Monday. Having something there meant something to me.

But this time, I’m really late.

I felt some guilt about it. I felt like I, kind of, let myself down. I felt like maybe there was a chance I’d disappointed someone else. And, to be honest, I felt like just forgetting about it all together. I mean, there would be next week.

I felt the power of how easy it could be to give up. Even if just momentarily.

I don’t think I’d ever known myself to be a person to give up. Well, at least not for what is important to me; and, this is important to me. The truth is, though, I briefly questioned that idea. I wondered if it really was important to me. I wondered if it mattered one way or another. I wondered if I believed in what I believe in. When I phrased to myself in those ways, it didn’t feel like I was ok with any of those notions. It didn’t feel like just fast forwarding through to the following Sunday was really what would be in alignment with my original intention. I mean, it’s not really a big deal, but forgetting about it just felt like I was ignoring it. And, I don’t think there is a lot of resolution to be found in disregard.

The question, “does it really matter?”echoed itself. Quickly followed by the real question I was more embarrassed acknowledge, “does it really matter to anyone?” I remembered, though, that wasn’t the question I’d asked myself when I started doing this. So, why am I asking it now?

When I felt that bit of shame attached to questioning my intention and motivation behind sharing my words, I also did my best to find compassion in that. To embrace that I’m human, that I’m fallible and that sometimes the things that light up my Heart might become temporarily dim from time to time.

I’d decided that I would answer the questions this way; it is important to me, it does matter and I do believe in what I believe. Those were the answers in my Heart, from my Heart. I knew where I needed to be. For me and not anything else. Late or not, I would have something.

As if right on cue, I received a text asking if I was ok and if everything was ok because there was no new post this past Sunday. I chuckled and shook my head at myself; the universe waited just long enough for me to decide, on the inside, that I did matter before giving me a message, from the outside, that it was true.

First believe. Then see.

Be Love.

it’s the sweetest

I’m a little embarrassed by this one. Like the, “it was so obvious, I can’t believe it took me this long to figure it out” type of embarrassed. I’ll explain.

Be Yourself

A timeless idiom if there ever was one. And, rightfully so. It’s good advice. It’s sound, it’s sage, it’s steadfast. It’s great advice, really. I’m sure only but a certain person would truly argue against that bit of elementary wisdom. That being said, I’m also sure that the concept of being oneself strikes a bit of fear in the minds of many.

We do what we do and say what we say for two reasons; to achieve a desired result or to avoid a potential consequence. At its most fundamental level, that’s the basis for our interaction with others. The idea to “be yourself” isn’t easy on the uptake for a lot of people for reasons being rather evident. A fair guess would probably say that a good majority of people aren’t overwhelmingly comfortable with who they really truly are. It’s something I figure to be a collectively disguised individual perception of how we believe we’ll be accepted, or not, by others. By that I mean, most us are scared to really be who we are because we have the same belief that, by being who we truly are, we won’t attain whatever desired result we want or avoid whatever potential consequence we wish to steer clear of.

The result; we’re not ourselves. We do things we ordinarily wouldn’t do. We say things that really don’t reflect our true thoughts or intuition. We, sort of, show a bit of who we are but not really the whole picture. We try to offer what we think the other person wants to see. But, I get it. I get why we do it and I do it myself. It simply speaks to the fact of not being fully confident and comfortable with what’s in our Heart. It’s a condition we’ve all been subject to. It’s why I qualify it as a collective perception. We all think the same thing about the same thing. It’s like being in a group meeting where everyone is nervous to be the first person to speak and share for fear of being different. But, once that brave soul breaks the silence, each other person sees their connection to the group. The perception of difference, then, dissolves.

This isn’t about the psychology of becoming comfortable with who you really are. This is about the overwhelming reason of why you should “be yourself”. This is the why “I’m a little embarrassed….” part. The reason you should “be yourself” is because that’s what the universe wants from you. That’s it. I’m a “universe” person. I believe that the universe can and will provide anything that a person truly desires to be the person they were meant to be. The only hook is that the person is aware of the alignment to that concept.

Being who you truly are is a relative concept in that we’re not all at the same place in our respective Hearts. Now, there is no Heart that has a greater capacity for Love or compassion or forgiveness than the next. But, there is difference in the willingness to show it. To live it. And, for reason of the idea to “be yourself”, that’s ok. It’s ok because you can only offer as much as you have an awareness to give.

Here’s the idea; if what you’re putting out there really isn’t the best of what you have in your Heart and you know it, you’re not going to get the best in return. It’s why when we try to adapt our actions or tailor our words in hopes of achieving the desired result or avoiding the unwanted consequence, we often don’t. And, you know it. You feel it. You don’t feel right about who the person it is that you’re trying to be at that moment because it’s not really you. You’re not lining up with where your universe thinks you should be.

Now, there’s a bit of a converse to this, as well. If what you’re putting out there IS the best of what you have in your Heart but is still kind of shitty, that too will still be what you get in return. The difference, though, is that the collaboration you have with the universe to attain what it truly is you should have in your life will just take a bit longer. It won’t be the most direct path, is what it means. That’s evolution. We all experience evolution, just not at the same rate of progression.

The universe knows what we all want, even if we don’t. It’s just Love. We are part of the grid that connections our universe, our Heart, our true self and Love. We’re the ones that provide the strength of connection to that grid. We control our signal. When we’re not truly in our Heart, that signal is weak. That’s when the universe is working harder than it should to be able to help you out. When you truly agree to “be yourself”, your signal comes through loud and clear. It doesn’t mean what you desire or manifest will immediately appear right before you in an instant but it does means that you’ve chosen the path of least resistance.

And, for as much as can be written about this phenomenon, for as much as can be read about this phenomenon; we all simply feel it. We have all felt it. We all know what it feels like to deny what’s really inside of us, that is, when what we’re denying truly is from the Heart. Yet, we’ve still done it and will continue to do so. It’s ok. It’s part of the learning and the evolution. The universe will never give up on giving you everything. It just wants you to choose what’s in your Heart. It just wants you to choose to “be yourself”.

Be Love.

and no, recycling isn’t the answer, either

Being in your Heart is work. I want to say it’s not; I want to think it’s not; I want to believe it’s not. But, I can’t.

Work isn’t a bad thing, but it’s not an easy thing. I can reasonably estimate that work is certainly not perceived as the path of least resistance. And, what most of us opt for when the going gets tough is the easy road. Especially when it comes to matters of the Heart.

Why is the Heart so special? Because it’s real. It’s really real. Naturally, when something possesses the ability to be the absolute most beautiful thing there is, the risk is also run that it carries the converse. And, when it really gets real is when it forces us to look at who we are. Or, realize who someone else is. When we don’t like what we see, real becomes reality.

Challenges to our Heart become very apparent. Do I believe that the Heart has a capability and power like nothing else? Yes, I do. Unequivocally. I believe it can change the world. I believe it has changed the world. It certainly has changed mine. And, the thing is, when it’s good, it’s good. There’s no challenge. We don’t take notice because the alignment is calm. There is no storm until there’s a storm.

When the storm comes, the alignment is not there anymore. Life all of a sudden becomes real. The challenges to our Heart become real. When alignment becomes misalignment, the universe forces us to take notice. It is when the work begins. And, with the work comes the reality. As soon as we start putting in the effort to correct misalignment, it forces us to identify the reason for it – you can’t find a solution until you really know what the problem is. The problem with problems is that we don’t like them. They can be ugly. They can be harsh. They can be debilitating. And, perhaps worst of all, they can be true.

Truth always possesses the opportunity to be its opposite. Call it what suits you; untruth, dishonesty, lies. They are ever present. We tell them to other people, we tell them to ourselves. The truth is tough to face. And, the more we don’t do it, the easier it becomes not to. That’s why being in your Heart is work. It means running the full spectrum of reality through your life, your emotions and your being. It’s not about picking and choosing what suits your level of courage.

The deception of reality is that which lies with its creator. I’ll be the first to encourage that we each create our universe and our reality. But, I also know that it means we are either choosing Love or choosing garbage. It doesn’t mean that by choosing garbage, because you can’t process and embrace Love, you’ve created a great universe for yourself. It just means you’ll reap what you sow. Choosing garbage is misalignment. You will feel it. And, you will feel it more. And, you will feel it until you don’t feel it any longer. And, if you haven’t put in the work to find alignment and the reason you don’t feel it anymore is because you don’t know any different, you’ve become numb to it or you’ve lived in the untruth long enough; well, you’ve created a reality that doesn’t have the support of your Heart. Of Love.

That’s why being in your Heart is work; it means taking out the garbage. Not piling more on top of it until you’ve become desensitized to it. The uphill climb is not really the work, actually. It’s believing that the payoff, Love, is worth it. It’s when, at your lowest, you can still believe that Love is worth all of it and to face whatever truth you’re living. There is nothing that’s more real than Love. There is nothing more true than Love.

Be Love.