Monthly archives "October 2014"

where to?

heart compass

Every odd time and again, a friend will kindly offer, “you’ve got it figured out, James.” My usual response, on account of that totally not being true, “oh, I’m not so sure.” Translation: “Jesus H Macy, no way I do!”

And, there’s a reason why I don’t have it “figured out”; it’s because it’s not for me to figure out. It’s already been figured out; a long time ago. In fact, it’s never not been figured out. It certainly wasn’t me that struck spiritual gold and said, “hey everyone! It’s Love! The answer is Love!”….as great as it would have been, that wasn’t me.

What will be my personal legacy is how I choose to find the Love inside of me. It’s actually the only real choice we’re ever making. Amidst the million other decisions in front of us, it seems that choosing Love isn’t really of urgent importance. I promise; it’s the only decision of any importance.

Love is your compass. It’s impossible to be lost; it’s merely a choice to be. Because we always have the ability to choose Love, it only follows that our misdirection, ie not Love, is also a choice (some sort of critical thinking ideology, I’m sure). We just usually choose (there’s that word again) to believe that the bad things are brought to us against our will, rather than them being a product of what we’ve created.

So, how do you choose Love? Simply put, by remembering you always have the option to do so. The way you do it, is by doing it. And, however you give yourself the chance to be in that space, will be personal to you. Maybe you tie a string around your finger? Or, carry something in your pocket? For me, I’m able (not always) to recognize when I’m not in that space and that’s what serves as my reminder. It’s almost as though, I just don’t feel right when I’m not operating there. It wasn’t always this way, and I fall down a lot. But, it’s my choice to pick myself up and find the next opportunity to be Love.

What works for you, will work for you. But, maybe something here will kick start that.

EVERYONE needs Love – as much as it seems some people just want to watch the world burn, we all need Love. This disguise has a lot of masks; anger, jealousy, hatred, pride and self-destruction, to name a few. Try to see past the mask and into the Love we all need.

Wear someone else’s shoes – when that person is really making us want to punch them in the face, chances are, we’ve probably done the same to someone else at some point. Pause and try to trade places with them. We’ve all been that person and had our reasons to be. Feel theirs.

You’re not perfect (even though you are) – don’t expect everyone else to be.

Get better sleep – I know, for me, when I’m not in a space of Love, it sticks to me. Before you act or react, think about which road will help you sleep better at night. Chances are, it’s the high one. That will be your guide.

Metallica? – nothing else matters; not what he did, not what she said, not your ego and not who’s right. Just Love.

Annoy yourself – “I am Love, I am Love, I am Love, I am Love….”

I don’t really have this gig all figured out. But, I’m trying, some days more than others. Even though you will find your own way, it will get us all to the same place. Our Heart.

be Love.


you delete me.


Early last week, the iconic, “you complete me” from Jerry Maguire hit me right between the ears. Even for a guy who semi-secretly likes rom-coms, that line kinda gives me the heaves.

After my momentary lunch losing false alarm passed, I thought, “hmmm, interesting”. (“Hmmm, interesting”, is my default response when I don’t know about something, but I want to think about it more).

Jumping on the contrarian train, I thought logically, “you complete me”, implies a deficiency of self in the absence of said person, aka the “you”. Whoever the “you” is at the time doesn’t really matter for blogosphere purposes. Basically, because of “you”, only then can a person be whole. Or so, TriStar Pictures would have us believe (insert gentle cynicism here). As I kept going with my thinking, I really started disagreeing with Tom Cruise – shoulda just stuck with being Maverick and Les Grossman. Granted, I can’t entirely blame Cole Trickle for my serene discontent. This whole business of “finding” that special person to substantiate our existence isn’t really a new concept.

To be precisely poignant and shed my slight discrimination toward the human race as being the culprit here, we actually try to “complete” ourselves from any number of sources; work, substances, sex, food, fitness, money, philanthropy and, as noted, relationships. It’s all part of a belief system that has us convinced we need more than ourselves to become who we think we need to be. And, that without the “more”, we’re not really anything at all.

As you’re probably expecting me to say, everything you need, you already have. You complete you! You, is what makes you whole. It’s not your family or your job or how much you volunteer or your khakis. It’s just you. Those are all wonderful parts of life, but think of someone that has lost their parents or is single; isn’t career focused, spends their free time reading and hates Dockers. Can they never, then, be complete? Doesn’t seem fair or logical that they shouldn’t have the same opportunity to do so as someone who lives the typical, “career, family, white picket fence” life.

We all have a Heart. And, we all have the ability to be Love. It’s that which makes us complete. All of life’s goals and successes, or lack thereof, are amazing! Truly, they are. It’s important to create a sense of meaning and purpose this way. But, when they act as distractions or deterrents to finding our true self, they lead us on the path of emptiness. We create the ability to experience that void with the attachments we seek. I promise that the key to feeling complete is by knowing that you have everything inside your Heart. The rest will be there waiting for you, not you waiting for it.

We may not know each other, but I know that who you are is perfect. It’s corny and it’s cliché, but it’s the truth. Knowing that all you need is you, allows you to choose Love. And, choosing Love makes every other decision in life for you. Let Love be the whole in your Heart.

be Love.


happy thanksTaking!

happy thankstaking

This weekend, if you’re Canadian at least, you get together with family and friends, eat too much, argue a bit and, hopefully, give thanks for all of the blessings in your life – big and small. If you’re an American, I guess you give thanks that Christopher Columbus got lost looking for garam masala. You get your turkey in November.

Regardless of what side of the border you’re on, Thanksgiving is an opportunity to remind ourselves of all the things to be grateful of. And, there’s nothing wrong with reminders. Reminders are practice; the more we practice, the better we get. My goal to have to every day be a personal day of giving thanks; not just reserved for one lowly day in October.

As we choose to pave our way to happiness, gratitude has to be in the foundation. To be able to recognize all that is beautiful and amazing and Love all around, is what gratitude is. From a bright red ladybug on a blade of grass to your dad paying to have your sinking driveway fixed, there are endless opportunities to be thankful.

What I think we overlook far too often, if not all together, is thanking you for being you. When’s the last time you looked in the mirror or sat in silence and said thank you for all the things you’ve done for yourself? My answer to that question is never.

We’re all full of such greatness; we’re great-full! We do so many wonderful things for our own well being and those around us, yet we probably very rarely pat ourselves on the back. I don’t mean in an arrogant or prideful way, but in a way of true gratitude. In a way of saying, “thank you, Me, for taking care of me”.

We exercise. We work overtime at our job. We split a piece of pumpkin pie with our mom. We give to charity. We don’t honk when we get cut off. We buy ourselves nice things we don’t need. We eat spinach. We don’t yell. We Love like we’ve never been hurt. And, we never give up on ourselves even if we want to more than anything.

We do all these amazing things for our self, and yet, for one reason or another, we come up a bit short with the thank yous. Maybe we just don’t think of it or maybe we don’t think we deserve it? Maybe we’re a little too hard on ourselves or maybe we have a bit of trouble of saying, “I Love you, You”?

This weekend, once you’ve slid into your after-Thanksgiving dinner sweat pants, take some time to think of all the great things you’ve done to be who you are right now. Try to show yourself the Love you deserve for being who you are. I promise that we all have more reasons than we can count to be thankful for us. When you start feeling that Love within, you’ll never be without.

be Love.



start today – Ending the Cycle


Each day offers us an opportunity to renew our resolve to the universe that we are ready for change. One of the hardest things in life is feeling stuck in a situation that we don’t like and want to change. We may have exhausted ourselves trying to figure out how to make change, and we may even have given up. However, each day offers us an opportunity to renew our resolve and to declare to the universe that we are ready for change. We may even say out loud that we have tried and struggled and have not found a way, but that we are open to help, and that we intend to keep working to create change for ourselves. Making this declaration to the universe, and to ourselves, may be just the remedy for the stagnation we are experiencing. And, it can be done today, right now.

It is difficult to understand, even with hindsight, how the choices we have made have added up to our current situation, but it is a good idea to examine the story we tell ourselves. If we tend to regard ourselves as having failed, this will block our ability to allow ourselves to succeed. We have the power to change the story we tell ourselves by acknowledging that in the past, we did our best, and we exhibited many positive qualities, and had many fine moments on our path to the present moment. We can also recognize that we have learned from our experiences, and that this will help us with our current choices.

When we do this kind of work on how we view our past self, we make it possible for the future to be based on a positive self-assessment. This inner shift may allow us to get out of the cycle we’ve been in that’s been keeping us stuck. Now we can declare our intentions to the universe, knowing that we have done the inner work necessary to allow our lives to change. Allow today to be the day to end cycles and enter into a new way of being.

by Madisyn Taylor


imho, omg, wtf? lol. ttyl….


We don’t talk enough.

Actually, some of us probably talk too much – no offense lady I see on the bus, but how much could have possibly happened in between when you woke up and 7:30am?….I digress.

The reality of it all is that the more we have the ability to be connected, the less we actually are. Phone calls now seem to be exclusively reserved for the computerized woman congratulating you for the cruise you just won. And, quite possibly, the last visitor you had at your doorstep was a Girl Guide trying to sell you cookies.

Now, I’m not here to start a revolution. I don’t want you to throw your mobile phone into a toilet or tell your internet provider it’s just not working out anymore. What I am here to suggest is a better way to use these communication tools. The truth is, they’re not going anywhere, anytime soon. At least, not until Doc Brown gets the DeLorean back from the future with the next big idea. So, might as well embrace and use them constructively.

Text messaging and email have created a great efficiency in getting things done. However, with that, can come a great impersonal touch. Not to mention, a high susceptibility to misinterpretation. Nonetheless, combined, they have become the most common forms of communication today. Their everyday use is virtually unavoidable. That all being said, I still greatly encourage looking someone in the eye or hearing their voice when you need to communicate, as much as you possibly can. Especially, when the communication isn’t going to be the easiest. Try not to hide behind your computer screen. Don’t send 41 text messages when a 4 minute call will get it done. Make the trip down the hall instead of sending an email to a co-worker. And, f emoticons. Walk around and actually smile at people. 🙂

In lieu of actual face to face communication, I offer the following:


Basics 101

Treat a person like a person. I’ve received one too many messages that don’t even say “hi” or, use my name. If you saw me in person, would you just start talking or would you at least give me a “hey Jimmy”? It doesn’t take much to create the feeling that you actually thought about the person and not just what you needed from them.

Dump the abbreviations. Actually, if anything, dump one abbreviation – thx. Unless you’re talking shop with George Lucas, keep your “thx” to yourself. Personally, I’d rather not get anything at all than a “thx”. Maybe it’s me, but I can’t get past what an afterthought it feels like. Especially when “thanks” takes so little to do. Or, by gosh, maybe even a “thank you”. Crazier still, “thank you!” with an exclamation point. Think of how that punctuation mark changes the dynamics of your appreciation. Why not show, as best as you can, that you actually do appreciate that person’s help and who they are?


Intermediate 201

Take a sec. It’s happened to all of us – we’ve sent a message that we should have been more patient about. Maybe we’re the instigators, maybe we’re the retaliators. Regardless, stop. If you’ve already written that message, don’t hit send. Take a minute. Get up and walk around. Put your phone down and get some air. Let yourself regain some composure before you let it go. I say with a lot of confidence that most adversarial situations could have been avoided with 5 minutes of simmer down time.

Say what? Written communication can be a real tough one. Something might sound like it makes sense to you, but that may not hold true for everyone. Take the time to re-read what you’ve written. Maybe ask someone nearby what their impression is, especially if it’s something significantly important. Even further to this, try to put yourself in that person’s shoes. Is it a message you’d like to receive? Can you use fewer words and be more concise? Can you elaborate more to ensure your true message isn’t misconstrued? Can you be more kind? The answer to the last one is “yes”. We can always be more kind. Don’t be apprehensive to respond to a message you’ve received with follow up questions before actually responding to the subject matter. If something doesn’t make total sense or add up, try to make sure it does before you give your final answer.


Advanced 301

Compose with Love. I’m not saying you have to go for the Oscar every time you hit “reply”, but always try to remember that you are Love. Whether it’s for business or personal matters, there is always the opportunity and ability to have Love in your message. You don’t have to gush or even be feely, but have an intention of Love. Let it speak silently through whatever your actual words are. Just keeping this top of mind will ensure you don’t have to think about 101 and 201 because 301 encompasses it all.


Every day in my office, I see many forgone opportunities to truly connect with the people around us. Often, I miss these opportunities myself. Today, this is my proclamation to be the change I wish to see in the world.

Please feel free to send me a “message” with any comments. Just kidding. 🙂   (All comments are truly welcome.)

b Luv.