Monthly archives "April 2014"

getting your pants less on fire


Every time you tell the non-truth, aka lie, you deny who you are. You deny yourself the Love you deserve from you.

To have the courage, commitment and conviction to be honest all the time is no easy task. It’s just inevitable that at some point we’re going to lie. Whether it’s a white lie, a grey one, red, purple; it doesn’t matter. By avoiding the truth, we’re avoiding the truth of our self. And really, is it “inevitable” that we’ll all lie at some point or are we all just agreeing with an idea that we’ve been conditioned to believe? Have we simply accepted that to “successfully” get through life, we’ll all have to lie at some point, or is that just a lie? If a tree falls in the forest but no one is around to hear it, does it….moving on.

Living with honesty, first and foremost, means living honestly with yourself. It means taking ownership over the opinions you have, the decisions you’ve made and letting go of the daily external influences trying to convince us of what we should believe about ourselves.

“Yeah but, Jimmy, some things are just easier to fib about rather than tell the truth and create a conflict or hurt someone’s feelings.” I get that. But, I respectfully counter by saying that cutting corners for the small stuff that doesn’t matter is just going to primer you to be able to cut corners for the big stuff that does matter. And, if those fibs don’t really matter, then why not just tell the truth?

Your truth has nothing to do with anyone else. It has to do with you. It’s being able to understand that you deserve to Love yourself unconditionally. And, it’s being able to understand that those who don’t Love you unconditionally for who you are, is okay.  

Recently, I created an opportunity to share something personal with someone. To say I was uncomfortable is a veritable understatement. Every internal negative self-talk reared its ugly head – “I’m a loser”, “this person will think less of me”, “I’m weak.” And, on it went. Regardless, my Heart wouldn’t let me off the hook. It kept telling me that there would be no way for this person to accept me as I am if I didn’t accept myself as I am. If I wasn’t forthright with them, then I wasn’t accepting who I am. I was just lying to myself.

As nervous as I was, there was an excitement I had inside of me. Was I going to look like jerk? Quite possibly. Was I okay with it? I was. I felt like I was going to set a bit of myself free. Even though that was my truth right now, the most encouraging part of it all was that I knew I could change it. We can change anything. But, the change has to happen through us. Whether that’s changing how we think, changing what we know, changing whatever; it’s all within us. We can’t look to the outside for our answer.

Next time you feel like you “need” to lie in a situation, ask yourself from what source are you denying yourself Love and from what source are you looking for Love. The Love which you find and create within yourself will be all that you need to give and receive from others.

be Love.   


a story about a guy

mr munchy


Amidst the hunt for eggs, chocolate bunnies and family hoopla, I felt more than compelled to take pause and write about one of my most influential sources of inspiration.

I know; I can already feel the squirminess that often goes hand in hand with any opinion, discussion or prophetic rant that grounds itself in religion. I give you my word, this isn’t about religion. This is just going to be about a guy.

A lot of people liked this guy; a lot didn’t. Many thought he was special and many thought he was an “extremist”. He was lauded to be a saviour and he was persecuted as a fraud.

The one constant; the message he spoke, taught and lived.

In form, I believe him to be no different from me. It’s a belief that gives me more hope, faith and reassurance rather than if he were some supernatural being dropped off on Earth by a flying saucer or magical stork. He possessed the same physical and mental faculties as I do; he needed air to breathe, water to drink and food to eat. He wasn’t without flaw and he wasn’t infallible; he was a human. What was “superhuman” was his consciousness and spirituality in his Love, forgiveness and compassion that he lived.

There wasn’t any “magic” about him. He was just a guy that lived as unconditional Love. A Love that he was often ill-treated for. It wasn’t easy for many to understand why he treated the poor, the homeless, the corrupt and the diseased the same as he treated his mother, father, brothers and friends. It was a society, not so different from ours today, where those who were deemed to be “lesser” citizens were turned away from and avoided. Yet, it was these people he drew himself closest to. It was these people that he showed the most Love.

When I think about what this weekend is meant to signify, I think I swim against the current of popular opinion. I don’t believe he did what he did to “save” us. I believe that he did what he did to teach us. To teach us that who we really are is our soul, not a body. To teach us that living as unconditional Love is what fulfills our reason to be here. To teach us that the way to save ourselves is to save ourselves rather than wait for someone or something to do it for us. The truth is, well my truth at least, is that we’re already saved; we never really needed it to begin with. It’s just a matter of deciding how long we want to live with hate in our Hearts before trading it all in to be that unconditional Love he was teaching by example.

I like to think that on their day off, he and Siddhartha Gautama aka Buddha, go golfing or go-kart racing with Mother Theresa and Gandhi. What I’m getting at is that, they were all just people. Only, they knew they had enormous souls and Hearts of an unrelenting conviction to Love, forgiveness and compassion.

The one thing that separates any of us from any of them is what we believe we’re capable of.

be Love.


way to take my own advice

the doctor is in


Not two days after I’d written about how we choose to experience guilt, did I make that exact choice. “Great, now I feel guilty that I can’t even practice what I preach”. Wait, I’m doing it AGAIN! Geez, this is not easy.

In thankful retrospect, choosing to be a victim couldn’t have worked out better. It’s given me an opportunity to share my failure; in truth, my success. Often, one and the very same thing.

We all have the choice to put ourselves in a higher place.

The details of what happened aren’t important. My omission of them is not to be intentionally frustrating, but to illustrate that regardless of what happens to us individually, we can all use the same tools to be better; to be stronger.

wasn’t coming to my own rescue. I wasn’t able to overcome my guilt and show myself the Love I deserved. Thankfully, without knowing it, help was all around me.

As I opened up to first my rescuer, I made sure to profess why what had happened “didn’t even matter”; that it “didn’t change who I was”; and that it “wasn’t even true”! In the wake of all that defense of myself, did I feel any better? No. In fact, the old adage, “what we focus on, grows”, was holding true. I was feeling worse the more I went on.

This quiet soul looked on earnestly, not saying much. As I eventually wound myself down, I finally turned my attention to this person. What my attention saw was a kind, sincere, heartfelt pair of eyes looking at me. Along with those eyes, a hug followed. Not an “I feel sorry for you hug”, but an “it’s okay, I know who you really are hug”. And, I thought – what matters to this person is me. Not what had happened, but just ME.

That evening, as I drove home from a gratifying workout at the gym feeling refreshed and upbeat, I thought – my body doesn’t care about what happened earlier today. It responded positively to the workout and in turn, I feel good.

As I enjoyed my dinner later that night, again I thought – regardless of anything outside this moment, this food is providing me with what I need and I’m grateful.

Finally, as my evening came to a close, I enjoyed some music; something I often do. As I listened, I continued my reflection of the day and thought – this music sounds the same every day. All that changes is how I choose to listen and absorb it.

In every instance, each of those positive experiences was a choice. As much as it seemed like what had brought me down was involuntary and forced upon me, it wasn’t. It was a choice of the negative. My rescuer’s hug, my workout, everything that filled my evening; was a choice of the positive. And, I felt better in every instance. Those instances were my true self shining through. My decision to feel guilt and victimized by what happened earlier that day was a choice of darkness over my light.

We don’t have to choose to be a victim. Get a hug, give a hug, run til your legs burn, laugh til your stomach hurts, eat an Oreo ice cream sandwich, blast your favorite song. Just get out of the way of the negative and Love yourself however you can in that moment. It can be the most simple thing that brings you joy. Make the choice.

be Love.